Howl’s Moving Castle

• Animation is all about the little things. Gibli do the little things better than anyone else.
• It felt a lot looser than their other work. Beauty without substance. Wasn’t it adapted from an English short story?
• I almost died every time Markl pulled on that coat. So cute.
• Howl wins the “gayest shape changing monster wizard who likes to pretend to be a woman, eat girl’s hearts, take long baths and dye his hair. And dance.” award. I have a sneaking suspicion he may have been the only contestant.
• My favourite scene: Sophie climbing the stairs to meet the King. Every time I catch a train I have to walk up the stairs to the platform behind hunched-over old Japanese women making exactly those noises. Perfect.

7.5/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Monday January 16, 2006. Shoutouts.

Memoirs of a Geisha

• I kept waiting for Michelle Yeoh to say something like “by finding a danna you have dishonoured my heritage and must therefore die” and then fly kick Zhang Ziyi square in the face, thus setting the stage for the greatest Geisha/Kung Fu fight in cinema history.
• The young Chiyo, Suzuka Ohgo, was flawless. Excellent performance.
• An entire cast speaking English as a second language made for a bizarre tapestry of accents. From Michelle Yeoh’s fluent yet distinctive Malaysian-Chinese lilt and Ken Watanabe’s softly spoken Japanese accented English to Zhang Ziyi’s laboured monotone, there was a lot of variety in there. The young Pumpkin even had a bizarre germanic twang going on. It distracted.
• When did Geisha dances turn into a trendy Paris fashion show?
• A movie set in Japan, about a fundamental aspect of Japanese traditional culture and 3 of the 4 leads are Chinese and 90% of the movie was shot in L.A. What does this tell you about the development of female stars and the protection of cultural properties in Japan. Anyone?

6/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Wednesday December 14, 2005. Shoutouts.

Serenity

• Wash is a leaf, apparently.
• Less written Chinese, more Japanese. Cussin’ is still all Chinese. Qing wa cao de liu mang.
• If Whedon wants this to run a while, he’s going to have to be mite careful of who he knocks off.
• Worked staggeringly well if you knew the characters, I can very easily see it falling in a heap if you didn’t though. I think it works better episodically. Less rush.
• Can Inara and Mal get it on already. Please?!! Fuck!

9/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Wednesday December 7, 2005. Shoutouts [1].

Maria: Full of Grace

• Honest, open and straight-forward and all the more disturbing for it.
• Catalina Moreno was amazing as Maria. Nice debut.
• Interesting in that it’s never judgemental, only revealing.
• They have Colgate in small-town Columbia. Go Japan.
• I wanted to slap the simpering little troll.

7.5/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Saturday December 3, 2005. Shoutouts.

Corpse Bride

• Grim Fandango anyone?
• Has Bonham Carter played a “normal” character? Ever?
• Texture work was incredible. The sets looked real.
• The world needs more singing skeletons.
• Nothing mindblowing – a polished and enjoyable distraction.

8/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Monday October 24, 2005. Shoutouts [6].

The Brothers Grimm

• Felt like the spiritual successor to The Princess Bride
• Gilliam gone normal? Where’s the hamster factor?
• French people make superb villains, I think it’s the accent
• How can people despise Damon? How?
• The kid in me loved this movie

7/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Wednesday October 12, 2005. Shoutouts [2].

Saw

• Great premise for a minimalist, psychological horror film
• a.) The temptation to artificially complicate narrative should be resisted especially if…
• b.) your dialogue is laughable, not compelling
• Slipknot video-clips do not make good cinema
• Cary Elwes?!! When did he get old and fat?

4/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Sunday September 11, 2005. Shoutouts.

The Interpreter

• Intelligent, well-paced and compelling thriller
• Penn and Kidman make a great leading pair
• I never realised the UN building was so cool
• Worth paying to hear Kidman’s Afrikaans/English/Wtf? accent
• Pollack produced Tykwer’s Heaven. Don’t they feel similar?

8/10

I liked the format so it’s here to stay.

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Friday August 19, 2005. Shoutouts.

Five line reviews of some movies I saw recently:

War of the worlds

• Lose Freeman, dig up Richard Burton (mp3, 15mb)
• The first 30 minutes were electric. SFX were amazing.
• Dakota Fanning must die. Likewise the brother.
• What’s wrong with U-lla? Why do they sound like tug boats?
• Ending was handled very clumsily. Hollywood schmaltz.

6.5/10

Death to Smoochy

• Worst performance by Edward Norton. Ever.
• Worst performance by Robin Williams. Ever.
• Most tragic misuse of Jon Stewart. Ever.
• Worst retarded Irish ex-boxer character. Ever.
• Hello tragic waste of potential.

1/10

Posted in Got-it-in-5 on Friday August 12, 2005. Shoutouts [4].